by Nicole | 04,13 | Blog
How I have used positive affirmations to heal emotionally from losing a child, sexual abuse, rape and alcoholism
I’m excited to share with you one of my secret weapons to healing my emotional pain. You can empower yourself daily by speaking positive affirmations over yourself to counter attack the emotional suffering you may feel after experiencing abuse or loss.
Did You Know?!
Your brain doesn’t know the difference between reality and what you imagine. Think about it the brain only knows what you experience and tell it. That is why regular repetition of affirming statements about yourself can encourage your brain to take these positive affirmations as fact to reprogram your brain and take your life to the next level.
It’s so important to create and implement positive affirmations into your life, especially if you have been wounded from abuse, rape, or loss. But, obviously the benefits of positive affirmations helps everyone.
You can use affirmations to:
- Build belief in yourself
- Increase your confidence
- Increase your self-esteem
- Create habitual positive thoughts
Since emotional trauma can put you on the struggle bus of constantly fighting depression, anxiety and dark thoughts, making an effort to use positive affirmations can help you heal and overcome faster.
Affirmations That Are Repeated Frequently And With Feeling Are Most Effective!
Repeating an affirmation can indeed help boost your motivation and confidence, but please remember you still have to take some action yourself. Affirmations are a step towards change, not the change itself. Say it, and then take action like you truly believe it.
Ok, Ok. Let’s back up here.
In all honesty, I use to laugh in disbelief when I would watch a movie or read a book that talked about positive affirmations. Especially positive affirmations for healing. How in the world could writing positive affirmations on sticky notes and then hanging them around your home heal you?
I mean who really does that in real life anyway? Seriously?!
On top of that how in the heck were positive affirmations going to help me heal from losing a child, rape, sexual abuse and alcoholism?
It all really sounded bogus to me until one day I sucked it up and actually tried it.
My life changed that very day and my healing journey finally begun. I know it sounds like I am exaggerating but I’m not. It’s true, and I am telling you this made a huge difference for me.
The first thing I did (in my head; because I wasn’t ready to speak it out yet since it felt so awkward) was, I started listing off ten reasons why I loved myself right after I woke up each morning. I had made an agreement with myself that I would give it 21 days. But, I knew deep down after that very first day I would be doing it for the rest of my life. The healing and mindset change that I needed so badly in my life was almost immediate, as I began to speak those words I so desperately needed to hear out loud.
Another thing I did after I got out of bed each morning, is I would look into my mirror and say, “I love you, Nicole. You are beautiful, Nicole. You are enough, Nicole”. It was super-duper hard at first. But, after a few days it became easier and easier.
The crazy thing was after about a month, I started to really believe that I was indeed loved, that I actually was beautiful, and that I truly was enough.
I also began writing in my journal. You know the journal someone gave you for your birthday years ago and you said you would never use it?! Yep, that one. And, little does that person know who gave me that gift, that writing out positive affirmations in the journal likely saved my life because of the action steps I took once I truly believed the affirmations I was telling myself and writing out to myself. The positive affirmations, as well as the empowering habits I began doing (once I believed the affirmations I was saying), with out a doubt helped me start to heal.
Repeating Affirmations, Writing in my journal and on my mirror is what helped me realize
- I was not the reason my 9 week old son died.
- The shame I felt from being sexually abused as a child was his to hold not mine
- That it was also not my fault those fraternity brothers my freshman year at Florida State University raped me even if I was intoxicated
- Being a recovering alcoholic does not define me.
I started loving life again.
Feeling empowered.
Forgiving myself and others from my past.
I Learned how to turn that frown upside down
To be get excited about getting out of bed each morning again.
All of this happened by switching my mindset into positive thinking, affirming that I was enough, and taking action with implementing empowering habits so I could heal from the inside out.
So, if you are finally ready to get the help you need to feel like you deserve love, that you are beautiful, you are enough, and you are truly ready to feel empowered then start TODAY with this simple process.
- Stating the affirmation you need to hear to out loud to yourself
- Acknowledge any doubt or limiting belief (even though/in spite of…) to take away it’s power
- Restate “I know I can/am”
Do this each and every morning and at night. You can even write it on a sticky note too or ask others you trust to say your affirmations to you as well. I promise you will not regret it and your healing journey will begin!!!
by Nicole | 03,24 | Blog
By Nicole Gebhardt
I Had Hit Rock Bottom.
I had a choice, either stay in the darkness of my grief and pain from losing my child to SIDS or start seeking the light of hope and happiness
On October 15th 2019 my life forever changed. It was Infant Loss and Miscarriage Awareness Day and I could not stop thinking about my son, Samuel, that had passed away when he was merely 9 weeks of age. I drank alone until I got so intoxicated that I fell down two flights of stairs that evening. My husband, Jeff, found me at the bottom. I was barely breathing and not responding to him. What happened the next few hours and days would bring you to your knees.
When we arrived to the hospital, the doctors did not even know if I was going to make it. I ended up spending a week in the ICU and towards the end of that week was indeed released, but was in need of 24/7 care from others. I knew that very moment my life needed to change and I made the biggest decision of my life to finally seek the light and get help.
I made a commitment to change
When making the decision in seeking the light and getting help, I promised myself and my family I would never take another sip of alcohol again. I also realized it was time to get honest and real with myself and others about my addiction, the loss of my son, and so many other heartaches I had endured, which also included a rape in college and abuse I lived through in my first marriage. I knew I needed support and was committed to the discomfort of change this would bring to me as I began rising from the ashes of grief and disparity.
I began really investing in myself and putting myself first for the first time in my life. I hired a life coach, joined an Alcohol Anonymous Support Group, started receiving Reiki Energy Healing to heal my PTSD from losing my child and the sexual abuse I had suffered I even took a trip out to Sedona to work through all of my pain and grief where I completely let go and let God. It was all finally finished. I released my pain and let the world feel the weight of it. I no longer had to carry it alone.
My relationship with the Lord was on fire, my marriage got stronger, and I became a better mother. But, most importantly I fell in love with myself and the woman I was becoming. I truly loved being alive and being in my own skin for the first time ever. The support I began receiving from others around me, near and far, once I committed to seeking the light was unbelievable.
I am writing this part of my journey and my story out for you to see that you too can seek the light. That you too can make the decision to get help, to start being honest with yourself and others, and to be committed to the discomfort of change. I want you to see how easy it is to also build a support system around you if you are truly ready to finally learn to love yourself, learn that you are enough, and to realize that you are not alone.
Please know you do not have to reach rock bottom to indeed get help. I don’t want it to take a near death episode for you to see that there is hope. You can find and feel happiness again.
I am here for you. I am ready to help you. And I would be honored to show you the light.
12 Steps I Took To Heal
On my journey to healing I am able to point to 12 steps I had to take to heal from the devastating loss of my child, surviving sexual abuse and overcoming alcoholism. I want to share these 12 steps with you today taken straight out of my Healing Cocoon program in hopes you will also heal to become a healthier, happier, and more hopeful you.
Step 1: Hit Rock Bottom
Decide it is time to change. Make a commitment to do the hard work of healing. Trust me it’s worth it!
Step 2: Get Support
You don’t have to do it alone. You need support. Start admitting to others that you are willing to accept help to heal. The Healing Cocoon is a safe space to heal and find your hope & happiness again
Step 3: Make Self Love A Priority
If you don’t love yourself you will not have the capacity to have healthy relationships. It’s time to fall in love with you, accept that you are enough and worthy of all good things
Step 4: Control Your Environment
To heal and transform your life you must have the right environment. You can’t control everything; but you have the ability to create an environment to thrive starting today
Step 5: Develop Empowering Habits
What you do minute to minute and day to day is what is shaping your reality it’s time to implement habits that empower your life instead of tear it down
Step 6: Share Your Story
You don’t have to hide your pain, it is time to start sharing your story and let others feel the weight of it. Doing this helps you to reconcile your pain and surrender the past so you can move forward and learn to walk with your pain instead of drowning in it
Step 7: Learn to Control Your Inner Chatter
Your enemy lives inside of you and it is every dark and negative thought that is running rampant in that sweet brain of yours, learn to take your thoughts captive and allow positive thoughts to reign so that you can attract goodness into your life.
Step 8: Do the Work to Become A Better You
Increase your confidence and learn how to shape your new identity as you let go of the past, so that you can become the person you have always longed to be.
Step 9: Take Steps to Being A Happier You
Happiness can be yours! Learn how to live in your moments and make today count. Reframe the past to live in joy and gratitude, and step into a life of abundance filled with things you love and enjoy.
Step 10: Forgive and Let Go
Not only do you need to forgive others, you also need to forgive yourself. You can be set free if you will only choose to forgive and let go, and let God
Step 11: Learn Healthy Coping Methods
Stop surviving through each day by numbing and isolating and learn how to fill your life with love and laughter again by implementing healthy coping methods
Step 12: Release the Pain
Discover methods that help you release the pain you have been holding on to so that you can heal and be free to feel happy again
The Healing Cocoon gives you exactly what you need to successfully take these steps to reveal, feel and heal your wounds so you can have hope for a beautiful and happy future.
The Healing Cocoon is the perfect place to get support because it combines deep self-work with the accountability of a support group where you are surrounded by people who understand what it feels to struggle with grief and also want to seek the light of hope and happiness.
If you are looking for a supportive group for daily encouragement and full of people who are seeking the light join us in my free facebook group.
Free Facebook Group
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